Is TikTok shaping your child's world more than you are? Here's what every parent needs to know and do, right now.

In February 2025, as TikTok's future hangs in the balance in the United States, we face a crucial moment to reflect on social media's grip on our children's lives. What I've witnessed in my classroom discussions has left me both concerned and hopeful – our kids are surprisingly aware of social media's downsides, yet feel powerless to disconnect.

The Raw Reality

Recently, while teaching a 5th-grade class, I asked the boys to weigh the pros and cons of their electronic use. Their response was chilling: they could articulate the negative impacts with startling clarity, yet felt compelled to continue. This mirrors what social psychologist Jonathan Haidt reveals in his essential new book "The Anxious Generation" – we're witnessing unprecedented shifts in youth mental health:

☹️ Girls' depression rates have soared by 145%*

👧 Half of all girls report feeling overwhelmed by social media drama*

📱90% of girls follow at least one social media account that diminishes their self-image*

😓 Just three hours of daily social media use doubles the risk of depression and anxiety*

One father's recent experience captures the challenge perfectly: "My two kids are 9 and 12 years old. Literally yesterday, I discovered my older son had created a TikTok account without asking permission (using something which seems to be called a "virtual browser")...It's probably our biggest tech-parenting controversy to date, with many more to come."

Taking Positive Action: What Parents Can Do

Create a Family Media Agreement

• Set clear boundaries for device use

• Establish tech-free zones and times

• Make it a collaborative process with your children
  

Model Healthy Digital Habits

• Put your own phone away during family meals

• Share your screen time reports with your kids

• Discuss your own strategies for balanced tech use

Build Digital Resilience

• Help your children identify misleading content

• Discuss the difference between online and real-life relationships

• Teach them to question "perfect" images they see
  

Create Alternatives

• Plan regular outdoor activities

• Encourage face-to-face social interactions

• Develop non-digital hobbies together

Have Open Communication

• Set aside judgment-free time to discuss social media

• Ask about their online experiences

• Share relevant articles and discussions together

Looking Forward

Whether TikTok stays or goes, other platforms will emerge to take its place. Our focus shouldn't be on fighting individual apps, but on building our children's resilience and critical thinking skills. As Dr. Delaney Ruston of Screenagers emphasizes, the goal isn't to eliminate social media but to help our children develop a healthy relationship with technology.

The reward centers in teen brains light up with each "like" they receive – this isn't just habit, it's biology. Understanding this helps us approach the challenge with empathy rather than judgment. Our role as parents isn't to build walls, but to build wisdom.

Remember: You're not alone in this challenge. Every parent who sets boundaries, every family that creates tech-free spaces, and every conversation about digital wellbeing contributes to a healthier future for our children.

🐝 What steps will you take today to help your child navigate the digital landscape more mindfully?

*This blog post referenced data from the Anxious Generation by Haidt, Jonathan. 2024. The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness. Penguin Press.